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Discovering that your teen “cuts” is absolutely terrifying. Is your teen contemplating suicide? How can you talk to him or her about this frightening problem without making it worse or driving a wedge between you? Dr. Michael Hollander is a leading authority on self-injury and dialectical behavior therapy (DBT). In this compassionate, straightforward book, Dr. Hollander spells out the facts about cutting--and what to do to make it stop. Vivid stories illustrate how out-of-control emotions lead some teens to hurt themselves, and how proven treatments such as DBT can help. You'll learn concrete strategies for parenting your emotionally vulnerable teen, building his or her skills for coping and problem solving, dealing with crises, and finding an effective therapist or treatment program.
Winner--American Journal of Nursing Book of the Year Award
- Sales Rank: #43006 in Books
- Brand: Hollander, Michael R., Ph.d.
- Published on: 2008-06-11
- Original language: English
- Number of items: 1
- Dimensions: 8.75" h x 5.75" w x .75" l, .62 pounds
- Binding: Paperback
- 214 pages
Review
"Very readable and highly informative. I read this book after my daughter had undergone extensive treatment, and I strongly recommend it to all parents, especially those who are beginning the journey through treatment with their child and trying to understand self-harming behavior. What I appreciated most about the book were the explanations of the root causes of self-injury and the guidance on how to interact with your child in ways that support recovery."--Parent, Boston, Massachusetts
"Dr. Hollander's book is a lifeline to parents, offering reassurance and wisdom supported by experience. He seems to really understand how frightening it is to be the parent of a teen who cuts. This book provides relief, hope, and guidelines to follow. I am truly grateful for this book." --Parent, New York City
"Dr. Hollander manages to take a very complex problem and describe it in a language accessible to teens, parents, and those working with them. Most importantly, he does this without sacrificing what we know scientifically about teen cutting. He is one of the top trainers in dialectical behavior therapy (DBT) worldwide, and it shows in this book. His skills as a therapist and his experience applying DBT with teens shine through. DBT is an effective treatment, and this book makes many of the fundamentals of the treatment accessible to the public. It is long overdue."--Marsha M. Linehan, PhD, ABPP, Professor and Director, Behavioral Research and Therapy Clinics, Department of Psychology, University of Washington
"This is an extremely thoughtful, wise, and empathic guide for the parents of teens caught up in the painful and complex web of self-injury. Both down to earth and practical, the book draws on substantial clinical experience and the latest scientific data. Dr. Hollander takes the mystery out of this confusing but all-too-prevalent behavior, debunks the many myths surrounding it, and deftly delineates state-of-the-art treatment principles. Dr. Hollander has done us all a great service with this book."--William S. Pollack, PhD, Department of Psychiatry, Harvard Medical School; author of Real Boys
"A truly remarkable book. Dr. Hollander offers a wealth of information about cutting, reveals the communication mistakes that even well-intentioned parents make, and illustrates specific ways of talking with kids to help them stop hurting themselves. Empathic, easy to read, and jargon free, this book is a major resource for parents and professionals alike. I recommend it highly."--Robert Brooks, PhD, coauthor of Raising Resilient Children
"The book was written primarily for parents but is an equally valuable resource for mental health professionals." (Metapsychology Online Reviews 2008-06-13)
"A reassuring, well-written resource for parents seeking answers, information, and help for a child who self-injures through cutting. While parents of teens who cut is the intended audience, teachers, health-care practitioners, and parents of teens in general may also benefit from the information and sound advice Hollander presents....Hollander offers practical advice to help parents better understand and communicate more effectively with their child. He clearly explains what is known about cutting behavior, addresses its causes, and identifies effective treatment options." (Library Journal 2008-06-13)
About the Author
Michael Hollander, PhD, a recognized expert in the treatment of self-injury, has worked with adolescents and their families for more than 30 years. He helped to found the 3East DBT program at McLean Hospital, in Belmont, Massachusetts, where he is currently Director of Training and Consultations. Dr. Hollander also serves on the psychiatry faculties of Harvard Medical School and the Massachusetts General Hospital.
Most helpful customer reviews
10 of 10 people found the following review helpful.
READ THE BOOK!
By Brittney Smith
Speaking as a parent with a daughter who cuts, i have learned alot from this book. I swore that she was doing foR attention and it was something i did wrong raising her. After reading the first few chapters of this book i was so greatful to learn that that wasn't the case. Hugh relief. I wont say that every case is the same as it has been for us but i do believe that they are all similar in some way. It's only been a few months since i "found out" about my daughters cutting and depression. With the help of ALOT of counseling and some time spent in a facility, which was very hard for me to except the NEED for, and medication. She is on her way to learning how to control the need. This book helped me learn how to except the cutting and help her finds ways of using her coping skills, DBT's. I would recommend this book to all parents that are in this situation. There is hope you just have to be opened minded and excepting.
5 of 5 people found the following review helpful.
A helpful guide for parents
By Jennifer May, Ph.D.
I'm a clinical psychologist who primary works in a Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT) modality in private practice and psychiatric hospital settings.
What this book does is in simple layperson language give basic explanations as to why people self-injure, describe how DBT skills can be used to help people who self-injure (e.g., DEAR MAN, GIVE, FAST, mindfulness, radical acceptance, validation), and give tips for parents about how they can more effectively interact with their teens when they have this issue. Hollander used some good illustrative anecdotes and examples to illustrate how to apply the skills.
I would highly recommend this book to the parents of teens and young adults who self-injure, particularly those who are already enrolled in a DBT program or are considering DBT for treatment.
However, I would not particularly recommend it for professionals who are already well-versed in DBT because it was 98% obvious information. I was disappointed because it provides very basic rather than advanced info about the topic and is really meant for people who know very little about DBT and self-injury prior to reading this book.
1 of 1 people found the following review helpful.
what treatment best suits them and ways that parents can help children ...
By Carmel
Aimed at parents, I found this book a help in understanding why teens self harm, what treatment best suits them and ways that parents can help children to learn to control their emotions and learn life skills and comfort tactics. It is written in clear ordinary language. It is aimed at an American readership so I don't know how valid the DBT therapy is considered here in Europe. The parts on the medical insurance and education systems are not relevant here. The first part explained why kids dysfunction in this way and their treatment. The second part I found most helpful. It explains ways of helping your child and also how to deal with therapists, schools, friends and family and most importantly your own and partner's health. As a grandparent I now have a better understanding of the situation and questions have been answered.
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